What It's Really Like To Work At Fab

The bit about holding out pay was a joke to get everyone’s attention. It worked.

Did everyone really know that it was a joke? Later on he says...

It was a joke. We have about a thousand jokes just like it. “If you have time to xyz, you have time to get fired.” It’s a joke about staying focused and not getting distracted.

I don't know him, I don't work with him, but I have worked with people like him and they were hated. They thought their jokes were funny. When people are being threatened as a joke, they have a bunch of names they like to call Mr. Funny, but the names aren't as nice as "Mr. Funny"

To write such an article a lot of research and talking with staff would have to happen and judging by the jokes in his emails and the tone of the article he hasn't done that and probably should sooner rather than later.

Repeating "it was a joke" is a childish defense and makes one wonder if management is mature enough to understand that when you, as the boss, send an email with a joke in it like "you might not get paid!", chances are some employees might not get that it's a joke.

Some people tend to think that behavior can't be malicious if you don't intend it to be malicious. This is false.

And this of course isn't even a defense, it's just repeating meaningless aspirational buzzwords. So why even bother?

Claim. [Fab] applies a culture of meticulous control.

Fact. Our employees have an intense amount of freedom within the structure we’ve created to make Fab great.

It's also very obvious you are just playing word games if Bloomberg says "11 executives left" and your response is "well we only had so many C-level departures..."

> Claim. A message on Feb. 4 carried the subject header “Do you like getting paid?” Goldberg told employees they were required to have a photo uploaded to the “team” page on Fab.com “in order to be eligible for the next company pay period. No exceptions.”

Fact. We pride ourselves on humor and transparency at Fab. As part of our major relaunch relaunch of our employee pages on Feb 5 we required every employee to be listed publicly. The bit about holding out pay was a joke to get everyone’s attention. It worked.

Reality - This is not a joke, and it is not even remotely funny. He says "It worked." If it was a joke, there wouldn't be any "it worked."

>Claim. An e-mail on Oct. 11 from Shellhammer, who serves as chief design officer, forbids people from modeling Fab’s products. Employees had been inserting themselves into shots of the company’s wares posted on its website. “If you have time to model, you have time to get fired,” Shellhammer wrote.

Fact. It was a joke. We have about a thousand jokes just like it. “If you have time to xyz, you have time to get fired.” It’s a joke about staying focused and not getting distracted.

Reality - This is also not a joke. A boss can't joke about firing his employees. It just isn't possible. Anyone who doesn't realize this isn't somebody most people will have any desire to work for.

Edit: Apparently he also threatened to put a bullet in a former employee's head for potentially leaking something. Clearly this guy has huge issues, and I suspect that the work environment at Fab is incredibly toxic. He isn't doing himself any favors with this post - http://gawker.com/266979/a-bullet-in-your-head

It's nearly impossible for an employee to tell if a superior is serious or joking, especially if they've been inconsistent in the past. It's anxiety inducing for employees to wonder if they are dealing with "friend boss" or "will I get passed over for a promotion boss" when someone drops by their cubical for some brainstorming.

Even brainstorming can be ambiguously "brainstorming" or "I actually want to see your reaction so I know if I can trust you".

I know all of this because I have made all of these mistakes in the past.

I know folks who work at Fab in non-tech roles and it is indeed a demanding environment with long hours and high turnover. But this is fairly typical of NYC ecommerce startups though...

Just based on that one interview, I doubt too many people get through Fab's entire hiring process who aren't already a cultural match. I certainly couldn't work there, but some of the things that bother me (mandatory coatracks and clean desks?) they probably consider benefits.

Would you say: "I have a gun in my desk, I'll shoot you if you don't..."? I hope you wouldn't.

I must say that given my involvement in the Y-Hacker community it saddens me a bit to see you eat one of your own, but that's life I guess.

Is it smart to joke about people getting paid and getting fired? Of course not. Yes, we know that getting fired isn’t the sort of thing to normally joke about. But before haters hate on us, come visit Fab’s offices. We have this thing at Fab called “do your one thing” - the notion that everyone should focus on doing the one thing they are the best at above all other things and that the accumulation of everyone’s one things creates a great organization. No one’s one thing at Fab is to be a professional model.

And it looks like it works for them! Their product is very nice, which used to be very hard if not impossible to achieve with engineering outsourced to India.

As an American software engineer, this is a bit unsettling.

It was a joke. We have about a thousand jokes just like it. “If you have time to xyz, you have time to get fired.” It’s a joke about staying focused and not getting distracted.

Saying 'it was a joke' is just a lame-ass excuse for being an insensitive douche bag. Sorry but not sorry.

The irony is strong here, that OP wrote a blog post to defend all their jokes that are meant to keep employees from getting distracted.

The thing about jokes is, they should have an element of truth to them that the audience will pick up on. If you're in a position of power over someone, be honest and straightforward, instead of trying to be clever with your amateur stand-up comedy career.

You still can have a fun work culture without acting like a drunk frat boy.

Sounds like bullying to me. No place for that. No exceptions.