(I also have a late-2008 MBP15 4/500 for home theater/hooked up to my projector, and it's obviously far far sadder than the MBA, mainly due to the drive. Once it starts swapping, it's game over, whereas on an SSD, swapping just sort of sucks.)
I pretty much wouldn't buy a Mac with less than 8GB again. Certainly true in a year, so buying one today with 4GB cuts lifespan a lot. I tend to buy fairly loaded machines for anything built-in, then upgrade to max all the aftermarket stuff a bit later once prices have dropped, and keep machines for ~3-5 years in some capacity.
I've got a 2011 15" with 256g SSD and 16gigs. I still get beach balls far more than I think I should. They never go away, just get less frequent. :/
I'm having a weird problem right now where iMessage doesn't work on an iCloud account for a system which had iMessage installed separately (on what, 10.7? I forget), then upgraded. Presumably the same fix will work.