Have Ideas to Help the NSA Handle All That Data? | Hacker News Reader

Have Ideas to Help the NSA Handle All That Data?

nsa.gov

55 pointsdownandout26 comments

Obligatory why should I work for the NSA video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrOZllbNarw

I don't know what their technology challenges are, but I can suggest a new slogan to help them with their PR problems:

"Lost all your data? Don't worry, we have a backup!"

Saw posted else where that people probably wouldn't care about privacy issues if the NSA offered free email, maps, video, storage, etc.

Which begs the question, if the NSA did offer such services, on their own systems, so great security, what would the take up be?

Depends, can I encrypt my data before I back it up with them?

I am reasonably satisfied with PGP/GPG. I don't assume that they absolutely cannot crack it, but I am confident enough that it is expensive to do. I would be willing to back up some of my data with them, after encrypting it. (Mostly stuff the IRS could get anyway).

They say: "NSA is interested in receiving unique and innovative ideas or approaches for use in satisfying our technology challenges."

It would be useful if they tell us what those technology challenges are :)

clapper@utdc:~$ sudo rm -rf /data/*

[sudo] password for clapper: No4thAmd

SELinux policy will prevent it

Spoken like a man who knows ;-)

SELINUXTYPE=mls

Dear NSA,

The most scalable way to collect your data is to pipe it to the quantum wormhole device called /dev/null. Please consider using this to transfer all data back to your data centers.

"Securing the future", as in, keeping it for yourselves?

"NSA will accept and evaluate unsolicited proposals submitted in accordance with the Guidance for the Preparation and Submission of Unsolicited Proposals..."

Proposal #1: Cut the crap. Just cut the self-inflicted bullshit out of the data collected - and you'll end up working with much less data.

Proposal: Execute operation "Office Space" on all surveillance hardware (pursuant to article Youtube Video ID PywI0BOxJpI [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PywI0BOxJpI]).

No data? No problem.

What about crowd sourcing ? Setup a big data server named NSAleaks. Change data like phone numbers, names and locations so that only NSA can map them back to the real value. Then let people search it. Offer a reward for finding abnormal patterns or terrorist plots from it.

Sure, pull the plug.

From the guidelines of submission: "Type of organization: e.g., profit, nonprofit, educational, Historically Black College or University, Minority Institution, small business, small disadvantaged, small woman-owned, etc. 4"

So many questions about this....

Basically the small business version of affirmative action.

As the example setter for curing social ills of all sorts, the Federal Government is actually required to prefer small businesses, minority-led business, etc. when possible on contractors of a certain size. This requirement extends to prime contractors as well for large enough contracts IIRC.

The requirement is easily evaded, of course. Big Contractors typically help a minority or disabled veteran start a business and land the contract at some inflated rate, and then the small contractor buys the service from Big Contractor and keeps the overhead costs.

I have known Big Contractors to actively seek out Small or Minority contractors in order to actually get the job. The little guy ends up with a agency type fee, once he hires the big contractor as a sub on the government job.

So many questions about this....

Not really. Pressure group set-asides have been part-and-parcel for government contracts for centuries. Minorities have been the most popular candidates in many countries for decades now.

Another common one is veteran preference for civil service jobs, though that inefficiency is less massive.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hlip7jZX9m0

Jump to 3:00 and feel free to act on all that advice she gives.

I was really, really hoping that this was a new posting (like, in the past day or two). That would've been amazingly funny in a dark sort of way.

Unfortunately, the footer suggests it dates back to 2009.

You mean the footer of the whole website?

No. It says "Date Posted: Jan 15, 2009 | Last Modified: Jan 15, 2009 | Last Reviewed: Jan 15, 2009" below the post.

Right, but they are obviously still maintaining their unsolicited proposal effort. The "Guidance for the Preparation and Submission of Unsolicited Proposals" linked to on the page was updated in April 2013.

http://www.nsa.gov/business/_files/unsolicited_proposals_gui...

lol

Hey, like when a recruiter found me a position with Huawei.

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