(non-software) engineers, lawyers, graphic designers, accountants, chemists, doctors define themselves by occupation and not some subjective non-metric of passion. Why exactly should programming be different?
I'm not arguing that programmers shouldn't be passionate about their work, or work on side projects. However, there's really no point in prevaricating over what a "Real Programmer"(tm) is, beyond the very simple working definition we have.
edit :
Words, like functions, work best when their meaning is simple and clear. Like functions, there's nothing wrong with combining them (e.g. "good programmer", "passionate programmer", "programming craftsman", "software composer"), but shoehorning multiple definitions into a single word will just inevitably lead to confusion.