>Overall, I'd say Go is an effective language. But not beautiful, or novel in the slightest

You are right on target. Go was designed to be boring[1][2]. Programming language should not be about tricks and traps. It's a tool. Tools are not built for beauty. They are built for functionality.

[1]http://talks.golang.org/2012/splash.article [2]http://aeronotix.pl/blog/go-is-boring

In [1](2.Introudction) even the inventors agree that Go can be boring to some people. Guess what, It's boring by design.