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As a heavy user of LLMs professionally, I too am so confused by the decision making process within these orgs. Do people really want them to speak like actual human connections? Why?

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I don't but RLHF probably does lead to this behaviour.

Is RLHF the best approach? It’s not how Steve Jobs designed the iPhone, famously. “Customers don’t know what they want” “A faster horse” etc…

I doubt it, but it makes sycophantic managers feel good to see it serve up the same BS they spew.

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