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Comment by hefner1456 | Hacker News Reader

If it was the other way around they would be saying what a hero he is lol.

Kinda off topic, but as a single Father I cant help but notice how much less of a support system Fathers get. When shit hits the fan its always people assuming the worst. A Fathers major support system is their Wives and Family. Good for him for having such a great Woman by his side... Im not complaining, just an observation

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> If it was the other way around they would be saying what a hero he is lol.

I’m not so sure, I’m convinced people would not bat an eye. Or at least I don’t expect any positive compliments, only neutral or negative.

That actually sounds more like it. It probably would have went unnoticed.

Yeah, it is complicated because we do live in a very misogynistic civilization with patriarchal privileges. It’s just often difficult not to overcompensate to counterbalance and resist these circumstances. Treat people as individuals instead of the archetypes.

As author wrote: we need to practice the benefit of the doubt. Or I like the “trust but verify” pattern

We consider it 'misogynistic' because women have more difficulty engaging in certain pursuits (career and enterprise) while more easy engaging in others (child-rearing, family life). It's because of our own bias that career and enterprise is worth more than family life that we say the world as a whole is 'misogynistic' instead of the truth, which is that some areas of life, it's easier to be a woman and in others a man.

I'd argue making women do more labor by forcing them to write articles justifying their marriage is misogynistic as well. Its just in that case people see it as acceptable because they think it's fighting the patriarchy. But really the patriarchy is not disappearing because of this comments, it's just insulting a random woman based on nothing of substance. If someone tells a women to wear more clothing to protect herself from abuse that's considered sexist, I don't see how this is different. Everyone thinks it's for the best

I'd also argue that misogyny had mutated into this implicit assumption where every woman is silently oppressed by the men in their lives. I find it ironically misogynistic that a woman is assumed to have no agency in their life and we have to police the men instead.

Indeed. On further reflection, it may say something that she was compelled to write such a piece defending her husband instead of telling others to mind their own damn business

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