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Comment by ElijahLynn | Hacker News Reader

Thank you for sharing your lived experience, it is meaningful.

I suspect some who say they like autistic traits, mean "level 1" on the ASD.

May I ask if this child is level 2 or level 3 ASD? I'm imagining it is quite a different reality with level 1 vs level 2/3.

https://www.autismspeaks.org/levels-of-autism

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My child is a level 1. It has cost me thousands and thousands of dollars to get her help because no one wants to give her resources because she's so high functioning. So high functioning! Yes my child who has random panic attacks and bolts in random directions. My kid who had a meltdown because I forgot to tell a friend that if she goes to one particular park, they have to get ice cream. My kid who is 7 and was suicidal from the social isolation that's starting up. And now that she's self-harming, now people want to give help! But not for the under lying issues. She's so high functioning (aka female and coping decently). She doesn't need pragmatic language help or social help or any of that stuff. Her spiraling is just purely chemical imbalance. Here's some pills.

My kid is truly high functioning. Only professionals tag her immediately. For everyone else it takes some long term intimate interaction to realize something is wrong. Any autistic adult who says this is great is coping. I have talked to too many high functioning autistic women and there only seem to be two camp: lots of mental health issues with possible commitments or intense treatment that their parents poured so much money into. And never of those is okay or what I'd wish on a kid. I didn't even know it was possible for a 7 year old to be suicidal without a major life event and apparently this is just a thing with some high functioning autistic kids. This is not okay.

I'm dx'd level 2. I was diagnosed until later. It's hard to be an autistic kid, full stop. Nothing but empathy for you and your daughter.

If it's any consolation, childhood years can be very tough around that age for autistic kids, but many of us find significant communities once we get online and around other autistic people our own age. Many of us go on to be very successful and happy adults once we find our niche.

He's never been classified that way as far as I know. I would say somewhere between level 1 and level 2. He writes very well. But speaking person to person, not so good. And as I described, there's significant rigidity in his behavior. For example, when he cooks, he can't generalize. Cooking is by time, not appearance, food has to come the same packaging etc.

Level 1 is minimal assistance needed. Simply "requires support". Might need headphones sometimes or additional space to process feelings. This can often be just some extra coaching or training.

Level 2 is "requires substantial support". This is where there are significant obvious impairments to daily life. You may not see emotional reciprocity, and peer relationships may be difficult. Sensory sensitivities may be more pronounced.

Level 3 is where people may be nonverbal or not always verbal. They may need significantly different communication systems like pictures. Aggressive outbursts, repetitive and narrow interests, self harm like head banging, shutdowns or meltdowns from moderate to mild stimulae are not uncommon. They will likely need supervision and may need support to consistently complete basic daily tasks like eating, toileting, etc.

I'm diagnosed level 2. What you are describing does not at all sound like level 1. Perhaps you've flipped the scale and meant somewhere between 2 and 3?

You're probably right. I may have flipped the scale. I see most of what you describe in level 2 combined with significant difficulty being flexible. At the same time, he writes very well expressing his emotions and insights. He can handle basic things like hygiene, laundry and food prep if it's pre-packaged but has a hard time with emptying the dishwasher. Frequently when he does things around the house, he is watching videos on his tablet in one hand and using the other hand for the task.

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