It's because the xmpp standard is absolutely brutal. I've tried to stand up a server and the amount of configuration I had to do just to get off the ground was absolute nonsense.
It's sort of the Apache of chat protocols and that's not a compliment.
It's sort of the Apache of chat protocols and that's not a compliment.
I run my own server for 2 people. Using Prosody [0] took some config but wasn’t that hard. Easier than installing Arch, harder than installing Windows ;)
Nowadays, there is also Snikket [1] by the Prosody maintainer, which is essentially an opinionated all-in-one configuration setup based on Prosody, barely any config needed.
[0]: https://prosody.im/
[1]: https://snikket.org/
Just like with Apache, all you need is a sane default configuration that covers the most common use cases, and I think modern XMPP servers offer that.