that’s just you lacking skills and making an identity out of being assertive. Rather than calling them skills, you go straight to “doesn’t make you non-assertive”. Rather preferring manipulation because it’s convenient and the only thing you’ve been taught. then normalizing it and the only excuse, you can’t be bothered. sure someone gave up after their 20th time. becasue they wouldn’t do the difficult thing. if you are having the same talk it isn’t working. So what if someone is making noises I don’t like. I don’t spend time with them. with kids you have all sorts of leverage. let them decide if it’s worth while. Yet, people want the kids to like them. As if that’s some standard to uphold. The discomfort of someone not liking the thing you tell them. then go back to lies and manipulation because liking the image that you throw up is better. yeah it’s not unfathomable, it’s common. this is the common person you meet.