It also sounds like you aren't going to be happy if you're at a school where you're just an account number, as you put it, so maybe you should visit some schools and talk to professors and students. Then you can save yourself the time/effort/money of applying to, or even attending, a school that you won't like. Though this might not be practical for you if you have strict geographic constraints (e.g. you don't want to move).
Disclaimer: This is from the perspective of someone who went from high school to a four year university (studied CS) and then went straight to a CS master's program, which is where I am now. So I thought about some of these issues, and talked to a lot of people about them, but I don't have actual experience to justify some of the above. Also, I'm biased towards grad school, which is hard work but a hell of a time.