You're spending your own money. I'm pretty sure that if there was one member of your family that didn't have money for food or medicine, you'd spend it there instead of donating it, wouldn't you?
A relevant segment on a 2h+ documentary: https://youtu.be/t1MqJPHxy6g?t=1936
Or before that: https://youtu.be/t1MqJPHxy6g?t=1702
If you've absorbed the American teaching that "if you just work hard you'll be successful", then you'd have to believe the opposite: "if you're not successful that means you're lazy".