I don't understand why people think they should be able to vote on things like this. Especially when they lack the necessary credentials to have an informed opinion on it.
I’m curious where you personally draw the line.
First use should be heavily debated and almost always avoided.
In response to {immediate pressing life threatening conditions at scale} .. they can be discussed and game planned well in advance and voted on - even if that vote is limited to a large pool with a breadth of military and diplomatic experience.
The current US practice of "POTUS can, like, do whatever" is pretty tragic.
We do every 4 years
The water treatment plant often will be voted on, because it will often be financed by a bond issue or levy that requires voter approval.
The apartment complex is the only one that doesn't fall into either of those types of projects, and this is one that gets exceptions because it is to solve a problem the local area is having by directly addressing that problem. They need more nearby housing, so they make exceptions for housing projects.
Not many towns have found their AI needs are hard to meet because of the latency over the internet to their AI provider's datacenter, and so need to get a local datacenter built.