For me, this constantly happens:

- I'll pause a podcast I'm listening to on my iPhone or iPad, or just take my AirPods out of my ear for a moment

- Like 5 minutes later, I'll squeeze the AirPod stem to resume playback. It will instead think that I want to play Apple Music on my Mac for some fucking reason.

I don't think this behavior can be easily customized (somebody let me know if it can!)