Some interviewers just want to feel special.
Come interview time someone will ask why I want to work there. My answer is: "You called me, why should I want to work here."
Don't think much about it, just believe what I am telling you. It is going to save you a lot of grief.
If you took time to do a little research and validate that you fit more than 'i need a pay check and you have paychecks' that's valuable for the company. Your judgement may be poor, but you self screened, so that's an extra screening.
Remembering (and using!) someone's name is a magic spell, too.
When it's done to me, it's the magic spell of "I Distrust You". A time or two is fine, as is its usage if one is -say- in a group conversation where it can be difficult to understand to whom one is speaking, or -say- one needs to get my attention when I'm focusing on something else.
In my many years of personal experience, I've found that people who behave as if speaking my name to me is a magic spell absolutely do not have my best interests at heart. At best, they want to manipulate me into doing something that I don't wish to do. I recognize that my opinion is not universal, but I am absolutely not the only person on earth who's like this.
Seems the message got distorted from "remembering people's names shows you care about them" to "use people's names unnecessarily or in bad faith". I was pretty upset by that Apple Intelligence ad where Bella Ramsey pulls up someone's name and then pretends she remembered it – yuck.
People who've read a couple of these books and are trying to use them are usually transparent, and it hurts way more than it helps. If they weren't inept at applying the advice, they probably wouldn't have needed it. Especially if they're not very young—if they're older and haven't picked up most of that stuff through natural observational skills and curiosity-driven trial-and-error, their odds of reading and practicing their way to significant improvement seem low.
This goes for "nonviolent communication" and similar, too. Trying to use these things if you weren't already a natural just red-flags "I'm trying to manipulate you".
"First, genuinely care" is only a little less useless than "be attractive; don't be unattractive". In practice, most of the folks with a problem in that area aren't going to read the book and do the work on that bit before trying to apply the rest. Those without such a problem, likely don't need the book.
But this was easier in the past, people used to trust more, and be somewhat more naive. Our current generation, jagged by years of manipulative advertising, Nigerian prince scams, SEO, religious and political leaders scandals and so on, it is not so naive anymore, and thus, someone trying too hard can’t escape our detection antennas.
If their interviewing results in a handful of qualified candidates, guess which one they’re going to go with?
I'd prefer not to work for a firm that's smelling its own farts. I'm happy to have worked for several firms where I really believed strongly in the product and the mission, and I've left companies when I felt they had lost sight of their mission. But at the end of the day, it's a job. I give you labor and expertise, you give me money.
Imagine having a first date with a girl and saying "you're basically the only one who would talk to me on tinder, but I could date someone else". Technically correct, still not something you say unless you're pretty far on the spectrum.