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Just need radiators, no fans, no piping, no ac compressors, no moving parts.

How? There is no heat dissipation without an atmosphere. I mean, you have dissipation via radiation but that’s very slow

Not that slow if the temperature is high enough. Power radiated is proportional to T^4

I don't want to run my cpus at optimal radiator temperatures... 1000s of degrees is not ideal.

Not on earth at least!

But, but—convection!