That sounds like a rather serious application. Did you file an issue?
Search the issues of the duckdb GitHub there’s at least 110 open and closed oom (out of memory) and maybe 400 to 500 that reference “memory”.
SQLite isn’t small and crashy, it’s small and reliable.
There’s something fundamentally wrong with the codebase/architecture if there’s so many memory problems.
And the absolute baseline requirement for a production database is no crashes.
Ah, missed this the first time around. Will check this out. And yes, I noticed that DuckDB rather aggressively tries to use the resources of your computer.