Dealing With Jerks

alexstechthoughts.com

16 points·mschonfeld··3 comments

A hidden message here is "Jerks exist". For many people startups are the first time they play a high stakes game and that's the first time they can really get burned by jerks. You might have encountered some in school etc, but usually you aren't put in a position where you rely on them.

This happened to me once and I found it hard to accept that someone would even be mean-spirited at all. It can take some time to get over this, but at the end of the day I think you shouldn't be overly cautious about this. If you worry too much about people being jerks, the cost of missed opportunities is likely to outweigh the benefit of working with less jerks. If somebody turns out to be a jerk, just be nice and try to remove yourself from the situation as gracefully as possible with as little damage to everyone as possible.

As a side note, as with most things, the jerk/not-jerk distinction isn't binary. Most jerks will have a nice side and friends that don't consider them jerks. Of course that doesn't help you if they're being a jerk to you, but keep it in mind.

The details aren’t important

I disagree. You don't have to name names, but it's hard for me to draw any lessons from your post without knowing specifically what happened. I mean, right now, all I have is your word that this person became hostile and was a jerk. From my perspective, it's your word against his, and you're basically saying, "Trust me, this guy was a total jerk." Well, it's hard for me to believe you without your saying what sort of actions this person took to be a jerk.

but that's the point. the post wasnt about a specific experience. The experience led to the post- but the experience isn't worth calling someone out on.

Reply on news.ycombinator.com