"Data has weight, but only on SSDs" - Not just SSDs! Unless you always hang the chad, surely writing data onto punchcards reduces the weight of that 'storage medium'!
Negative mass = negative energy, so we should be able to make an Alcubierre Drive out of punched cards.
If some PMs today evaluate performance by the number of lines of code, I wonder if the punch card equivalent was weighing the punched-out holes that were removed by each developer.