>so the residents (and businesses) are super accommodating of families with kids. To the point where if I have to take a little one to the bathroom in a restaurant, people often invite my big one (5 year old) to hang out at their table so I don't have to worry about it.

My experience so far with a kid is most people will just tolerate your child. I'm surprised your running into that attitude.

Other new parents I know that are in the suburbs aren't all surrounded by family's either. I think aging people aren't downsizing their houses and moving around. Careers scattered and cheap homes scattered everyone around.

Maybe NYC is just different. I mean I'm 100% sure it's different. I'm grew up in a NYC suburb lol