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Comment by bad_haircut72 | Hacker News Reader

They can say whatever they want but Usain Bolt gave me his gold medal so now Im the fastest 100m runner in the world

Sorry you got scammed, FIFA awarded me their 100m sprint gold medal so I'm the real fastest 100m runner in the world

You guys are idiots. I got an entire TV network to tell everyone I’m the fastest 100m sprinter in the world so that title should belong to me.

Meters and seconds (AND THEREFORE SPEED AND ACCELERATION) are a CON JOB and CONSPIRACY of the RADICAL LEFT!!1! Thank you for your attention to this TRUTHING! covfefe

I just revised all the footage from the birds in your area and couldn’t find any proof of your claims.

Lying to the Bird Intelligence Agency is a Feral catcrime.

The birds, who many people are saying aren't even real, are SPREADING LIES from the RADICAL LEFT claiming I can't run 100 meters!

FIFA did themselves a solid punch in the face with that one.

And to make it better, Trump kind of presented it to himself.

Amazing.

Key bit at about 35 seconds in.

https://www.theguardian.com/football/2026/jan/18/embarrassme...

He presented it to himself? How Napoleonic!

FIFA were using it to get an anti corruption investigation cancelled. And the world cup and FIFA corruption are safe from Trump interference. Worked for them.

But if Usain Bolt truly believed that you were better than him and indeed gave you the medal, then maybe you really were the fastest runner in the world?

This would only take away credibility from Bolt. Specially for something that has so little subjectivity as "running fast". I this really happened the most likely case is that Bolt joined a cult and got brainwashed to believe the cult leader is faster than him.

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