Fair take for nontrivial projects.
Buuut with Go one in general tends to reach less for dependencies so less likely to run into this and cgo is not go ;) https://go-proverbs.github.io
but for cross-compiling actually ended up filtering out the liconv flag with a bash wrapper and compiled a custom zig cc version with the support for exported_symbols_list patched in, things appear to work.
Should look into cross-rs I suppose. Hope it's not one of those "download macos sdk from this unofficial source" setups that people seem to do. Apparently not allowed by Apple.