Years ago, at a mindfulness meditation retreat, I heard the word "skilful" used in a very specific way.
Since then, I've tried to become more skilful, and your reply above really evinces the "ongoing journey" nature of that work.
I wish you the very best in your journey!
Great way to put it: "skill"
Learned/experience/must practice the skill of getting comfortable!
Tell me more about retreat? In overall terms? Worth it? Worth doing again?
Also - did it include any substances? Not judging one way or another but I know that some psychedelic concepts align with some retreats.
It was at a point in my life where I was able to do it (and I'm grateful), but I have a kid in kindergarten now, so it'd be hard to convince my wife that it's important enough that she should single-handedly manage for a week.
Overall, I think the major benefit for me, was that it bootstrapped this mental model:
* Our minds are constantly spawning processes, and "learning how to start + keep running a debug process" is an invaluable tool for gathering data.
* Once you've gathered a reasonable amount of data, you will start to spot patterns. One of the teachers at this retreat expressed it as "wisdom will arise"
I have a long way to go, but I'm grateful every day that I have this foundation.
In an ideal world, it'd be nice to do this again, to compare where I am today (IIRC, it's been ~8 years).
P.S. there were no substances included :)
For what it's worth, I think recognizing patterns and then stepping away to say "execute this way, or choose another way" is a huge huge skill. Not all past patterns make sense for current/future situations!