New report calls for end to child marriage in the US

Instead of anecdote, they provide statistics about child marriage, one line earlier:

“At least 60,000 marriages since 2000 have occurred at an age or spousal age difference that should have constituted statutory rape under the law.”

  It’s estimated that, each year, 12 million girls around the world are married before they turn 18. The perception that child marriage is something that happens to other kids in other places – not the United States – is a false one.

  Between 2000 and 2021, nearly 315,000 children were legally entered into marriage across the U.S. The vast majority were girls wed to adult men.

  Mandy’s mother encouraged her to become affectionate with the man from their church in Arizona who was showing an interest in Mandy.

  He was aged 18. Mandy was 12.

  His grooming and abuse continued for years, fully sanctioned by Mandy’s mother, who spoke of God’s plan. He proposed to her four years later, and she tried to say no. After exhausting every possible way to escape what her parents were forcing her to do, she ran away, but as a minor, she had no power. Her parents were able to force her back home and into marriage.

  Mandy was married a week after her 17th birthday to her 23-year-old longtime rapist and abuser. 

  She was trapped in a marriage marked by relentless emotional, physical, verbal and financial abuse.

  When Mandy finally escaped as an adult, at age 20, she was excommunicated from her church. She lost all her family and friends. She was left to rebuild her life on her own.

From the perspective of someone who's not married but who has been denied marriage most of my life. If I were married (or betrothed) when I was younger then I think I would most certainly have avoided sex before marriage and a lot of soul-destroying traps such as pornography, and other terrible vices such as vaping, excessive alcohol.

If having a job or having lots of money, or having a house, becomes a prerequisite to getting married then: - the rich take all the the woman (like in Braveheart, the noblemen having sex with the peasant's wives) - anyone who gives their money to the needy in obedience to Jesus, i.e. the good Samaritan is unqualified to take a wife, when he's actually the most qualified and will care best for the person out of love - robots with increasing rights and less regulation will be taking "wives" (that is abomination by the way) before even human beings can and giving them more rights than human beings is plain evil to be honest.

Marriage was instituted by God when people were created. The Bible says that in the last days people will deny marriage.

When I read this article, I see it as using a straw man fallacy in their argument to attack the effectiveness of the institution of marriage which God has put in place which is inherently a good institution.

Marriage is when you begin your own family. Young betrothal seems like a very correct and good practice because a guy can then think about how he is going to take care of this person, and prepare for that, perhaps go out and get a job, or whatever that preparation looks like and that gives so much meaning and purpose to what they're doing. So if he's going through college, sorting himself out, it's done knowing that there's someone to take care of, someone who is very special to them. It's very motivating and they're going to avoid many pitfalls that people often go through during college years. How many problems would be solved if young people were able to have hope, and joy, and faithfulness and security in even one of their relationships while living on this earth, and for that relationship to have started before they were exposed to the evils in the world?

I probably would've made it through university with far better grades without wasting years of my life through depression and filling the void with things that are not good. Take away the good and false substitutes fill the void. If I were married when I was younger then I would've been able to share life with someone where we could just will the good for each other unconditionally and not spend excessively on what the world says you need in order to be "successful" in order to "attract a wife" or be "eligible" to take a wife, say.

If you were to pick one food to eat for the rest of your life what would it be? If you were to choose one person to marry and be in covenant with for the rest of your life who would it be? Obviously, someone that you would want to be around for that long. Now if some woke person came along and said, '"that's outside of the range of the typical age gap", you must be a rapist' or something like that, that's just a blind assumption. That's how marriage gets attacked these days.

There is reasonable protocol when it comes to marriage, and it's going to automatically deal with lots of issues such as whether someone is too young to marry. You typically consult the parents of the other party in order to get their approval. So, yes, it makes sense that a person should be able to at the very least "propose to their potential future wife when they are young".

A young couple should be allowed to marry, or at the very least be betrothed to get married, before 18 even, in my opinion. But the husband has to get permission from the parents of the woman, or a guardian, say. That helps solve problems like if they're too young, etc.

Then the husband prepares to have a wife, and he has purpose in his work and joy in doing it, duty to love his wife etc. (where being forced to be single robs that and makes life difficult). When a man thinks they have to "date", sleep around, go to "bars", get a bitcoin, get house, whatever it is that society tries to shove on you as some kind of prerequisite to getting a wife, then that's not correct thinking. A person should simply be allowed to propose to the right person when they come along.

Getting married young doesn't mean having children young. Marriage is very good when done in good faith. For Christians this is the way to do having a partner, and it's a holy and sacred covenant and done in the fear of God (not wanting to do evil). Christians are meant to be policing themselves to keep a good conscience with God.

I think the reason why larger than average age gaps are so stigmatised in today's society is because people see sex and relationships as disposable.

But don't make marriage out to be the bad thing. It's not inherently a bad thing. It's inherently a very good thing.

I would say that "actual child marriage is wrong", though, but I don't think this article is accurate in defining what that is. In defining what child marriage is, it's got to take into account what the parents think and if the parents are acting righteously themselves. Are they saving for their children's future? Are they helping or causing harm to their children by preventing them from marrying. I do believe that the state should protect people and the sacred rights of people, rather than trying to over regulate it. I think that current minimum age seems totally reasonable already.

I've been told by a police officer in a church that 10 years age gap is wrong in front of a whole bunch of eligible young adults, even though my parents themselves have 11 years age gap.

So what happens as a consequence of the sabotage of marriage? False substitutes and temptations often take the place, and the person falls into a pit of sin, and self destruction.

What makes a person eligible to take a wife? Being a man is practically all that makes a person eligible. A single person who has no assets is eligible to have the right to propose. Marriage, like water and air doesn't depend on the US dollar in order to exist. A person can get married for free. The best things in life are free. And that's what marriage should be like. A bird should not be forced to get a pilot's license in order to fly. A man should not have to get some kind of license in order to breath or in order to propose marriage to a woman. It should be joyous and helpful, and when the right person comes along it should be lawful to propose to them.

If we're keeping God's commandments for us, loving one another in the way we're supposed to, then nothing should be stopping us from proposing. It's these man-made rules which become destructive to one another and to society when they nullify God's rules which are meant for our own good. When people say "you're too old, you must be a predator", can they see your thoughts and your heart? It could literally be satan trying to keep you in slavery to sin, to addictions, substances, pornography, sex outside of marriage, etc.

I think that marriage should be further protected rather than further chipped-away-at. Rights should be given to people to be able to propose marriage without fear of punishment. Because noone wants to live in fear. We want to live in love.

Perhaps the government should focus more on a bit of wealth redistribution, instead of continuing to reverse-engineer and replace people, micromanage, control and monetise every single little thing.

Just because there are a times when it hasn't worked out, or few bad eggs in the batch of people who get married young, you don't ban the whole thing for everyone.

You don't need marriage to have kids,you don't need marriage to love another person, you don't need marriage to live with a partner and you don't need marriage to have a fulfilling social life.

The purpose of marriage is economic, so it's not necessary to achieve anything social. It is useful when you want protect your partner and kids from sudden death or disability, which should come AFTER the love/social part.

I am not married, I have 2 kids, been with my "wife" (partner?) for 15 years.

In Canada we are considered like married though, economically speaking.

And, even more bizarrely, when there was a recent push to abolish it, it was resisted by, among others, the ACLU and Planned Parenthood branches on California (despite the same organizations national and relevant state organizations not opposing moves to ban child marriage in other states.)

(This is very much not an endorsement of those laws or that approach.)