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> Rock-solid distros like Debian, Ubuntu, Fedora don't have that "cool" factor so noobs don't even consider them

Isn't Ubuntu the first thing a "noob" thinks of when they hear the word "Linux"?

CachyOS is the new cool noob distro, with plenty of footguns so it stays fun

Ten years ago, sure. Judging from their landing page, not any more.