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Comment by 0cf8612b2e1e | Hacker News Reader

What do you now do instead of gaming? Do you find you have swapped for a different activity or a more balanced allocation of time among other things? Or do you still spend your off hours in the same way, but kicked the compulsion for gaming all day?

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I do the work I probably should be doing, or side projects, or spend time with my kids, or go on a walk, or follow up on that thing I've been putting off, or any of the other million things that are more productive and fulfilling than video games are. It's embarrassing to admit that I was a grown man who would put off basic, important tasks just to play games but I did. Now I don't.

It's not even really about choosing not to, either... it really does feel fundamentally like I cannot even derive a dopamine response to video games at all anymore, period. Same could probably be said about doom scrolling social media or whatever else. I just get no false positive feedback loop from the act.

If it works for you keep it up. As someone who finds video games an art form I find the 'avoidance to do better things' quite similar to someone who might avoid reading or watching movies as a hobby.

I suppose if you just play the same game day in and day out and it has no real substance (which admittedly is probably the largest gaming segment) it might be a good thing to get rid of the habit. But some games are masterpieces and they often hit very different than other mediums because you are the protagonist making choices. In my opinion some of the best stories come in the form of games and I find it a real shame there's a portion of the population who think they're a complete waste of time.

I think there's also something to be said here about being addicted to work. I know such people and it's just as sad even if it's what society expects of them.

I think the context here is important. regardless if videogames are an artform or not. putting off work, parenting or whatever are priorities in life to get a videogame fix is not the same as playing video games in your leisure time when is not an impulsive decision

That is true, and if something like gaming (or reading, or playing sports, or building model airplanes or whatever other passion) actively interferes with your functional life, that's a huge problem. But there is nothing wrong with taking a day off work to play a new video-game that just came out, if that's your passion, even if it's "putting off work", or similarly in having someone else look after your kids for an evening to enjoy some gaming. Adults very rarely have alloted leisure time where they can just pick an activity. There is always something "more productive" you could be doing instead of pursuing a hobby, especially if you have kids. That doesn't mean that any time you pursue a hobby instead of one of these activities you are being irresponsible - there must be a balance. All work and no play, and all that.

Fully agreed when it starts interfering with your life you should reassess as with anything. But honestly I see gaming as a further place to connect with kids if you enjoy them. Something like Animal Crossing, Mario Kart/Party or Jackbox Party Pack can be some of the best bonding experiences out there. And it also lets you teach your kids how to have a healthy relationship with games/dopamine.

It depends on degrees. If you're going to lose your job and your wife is about to leave you stop doing it. If you just did 12 hours of work/chores/put the kids to bed and want to relax with a bit of gaming? Some people would still feel guilty but I haven't a clue why.

You can't judge someone for not liking a certain hobby. I spend a few hours gaming before bed each night after the bare necessity chores are done, but I have a nagging feeling in the back of my head that there are better things I could be doing with my time, and that's a healthy feeling. I've also had a time in my life where I spent almost all of my awake time trying "artistic" unique indie games, all very highly reviewed and well-made, and while yes, it is a unique and enjoyable art form, it still felt empty in a way. It's still all just pixels on a screen. Yet another Unity game. Yet another fetch side quest. Meanwhile I was unemployed and too depressed to make a good effort at applying for jobs, my self esteem so low that I felt nobody would hire me, living in a crappy old apartment in a crappy part of town, a major downgrade from how my life started.

I don't judge people for it necessarily but I sometimes wonder if they have the wrong idea about what games are. There definitely are problem games that are essentially gambling addictions manifest so the stigma is sometimes warranted. If you sit around playing the same dungeon in a Diablo game 8 hours a day trying to get an item that raises your power 0.5% you're probably off the deep end. But playing something like Clair Obscur or Elden Ring gives me a very unique experience that eventually ends. And the game ending / not wasting your time too much tends to be criteria I use when choosing games as well.

If you look back on that time of low self-esteem and a crappy life I bet there was a myriad of other things causing it and games were just your drug of choice for 'dealing' with it. At least that's my experience. And IMO if your life avoidance drug is games instead of almost anything else (alcohol, marijuana, etc.) you're probably doing better than most in such a situation.

"It's all just pixels on a screen" isn't really an argument for me because my work life, much of my social life, and almost every other form of entertainment that isn't video games (including what I'm doing right now) is all just pixels on a screen as well. And playing games with friends that are across the country or a few hours away is absolutely the best way to be social with them possible. Hell even when I go on vacation I make damn sure I capture pixels on a screen to look at later.

Can't speak for OP but I largely spend it reading (and web). I bought a kindle recently because I found the ipad/iphone were too distracting to reliably avoid web surfing instead of a book. I view the switch to long form content as a form of information dieting in the same way as a switch to whole foods.

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