How I accidentally created the fastest CSV parser ever made

The old-timey hacker, non-corporate-friendly webpage design is great...

Back in the day every self-respecting hacker doing it for fun would have either something "edgy" like this (a person like jwz) or it's opposite, a lightweight barebones immensely readable page.

How a friend of mine created a super fast csv parser by playing with branchless programming and SIMD to avoid the CPU serialized computation bottleneck