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Comment by zeroq | Hacker News Reader

And the problem is - after a few screw ups I've told myself - hey, maybe you don't know it all, maybe they have some secret formula you don't know about, just take it easy, lay back, don't be a smart ass, and let them take care of you. Be open minded.

I mean, I drove a Mustang in EU, shipped from US before Ford started selling them here. Local Ford didn't even had "mustang" in their system. I kept trolling them when they were offering free service for Ford drivers. My first 6 car mechanics were either a total scam or they were genuine but had absolutely no clue what they were doing.

What was I thinking? Maybe that the trade is regulated, and people with a title are more professional? Hell no.

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You probably won't make any progress you if think of therapists like car mechanics, where you give them your broken car and they give you back a fixed one a few days later. Therapists can't just poke around in your brain to find the problems. They certainly can't fix them without your participation.

It's more like working with a physical trainer. You won't accomplish your fitness goals by just showing up. Rather, you need be engaged, learn how to actually use the tools they give you, strive to improve yourself and put in the effort to do so.

Have you even read my post?

I met a gal who kept silent for five visits.

Five paid visits and I got no feedback at all. Silent treatment is what you call it.

And when I finally confronted her about that she told me that I'm making a scene, because normally people are seeing a change only after couple of years.

I'm not defending every therapist in the world, I'm responding to your car mechanic anecdote.

It kind of proves it is a scam. You tried it, it did not work. But for some reason you lived experience is invalid, and you should keep trying again and again!

I know a few people, who import and run vintage american cars in EU. They do all servicing themselves, buy spare parts from american ebay. They totaly think modern car industry is a scam. They would never allow some "professional" mechanic into their beloved car.

> It kind of proves it is a scam. You tried it, it did not work. But for some reason you lived experience is invalid, and you should keep trying again and again!

This is like saying dating is pointless because you dated a half dozen people and didn't end up marrying any of them. (That attitude is also increasingly common these days I've found, maybe because we've all been spoiled by the conveniences provided by the internet and modern consumer capitalism.)

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