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Sounds like some form of guardianship/conservatorship is in order. Talk to a lawyer, if you haven't already (maybe that's what you mean by finances are already segregated).

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The question is, what can YOU do now to avoid risk to your own estate once you are old and start losing your mental faculties?

Build those things into your estate. My family made a trust that pays bills and what not. So your income goes to the trust and you use it to pay regular bills and groceries and what not. Anything on the "not-approved" list takes a vote of the people controlling the trust (parents and kids). That has helped us avoid some bullshit so far.

Of course, you avoid the pig butchering, but open yourself to abuse from the trustees. Reasonably want a new BMW? Hope your kid is ok with their inheritance shrinking by $60k. Etc.

I'm not claiming a trust is a bad idea, only that you need to take care picking the trustees. And be sure there's an "out" if you and the trustees fall out.

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