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Comment by humanono | Hacker News Reader

You are what you are because of circumstances.

Which is fun and great if you came out as a happy cool human.

If you made it through the weird unadjusted side without any gimmick you just loose.

No one has to force you to stay what your surroundings made you. It's not your personality it's just a reflection and you can change it and make it better for you by adjusting and reflecting.

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Sometimes people already are like something and don't want to change it or feel like they could change it, but also don't get along being like they are. This is more awkward to think about than just treating them as damaged or incomplete people who would get around to becoming people who can fit in fine once the damage is fixed or the incomplete development is completed, because it's harder to see good solutions.

You severely underestimate the biological side of things regarding social interaction. Neurodivergent people are what we are not just bc "surroundings made us so"

That includes people like me who are neurodivergent

And I'm also not shaming anyone not wanting or unable to chain themselves.

It was a statement about the uniqueness of ones character and the agency of controlling it/changing or adjusting it by yourself

Then I don't understand what you are arguing about. If you're neurodivergent, you would always require self awareness and masking, faked as op rightfully stated. You could never natural, no matter what circumstances were.

I changed very slowly and steady over the last 20 years.

This has very little to do with masking.

Changing is possible even if you're neurodivergent, but you'll always have some barriers that neurotypicals don't. To interact with them, you will generally need some degree of masking.

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