For example I can define a notsemaphore actor that calls a callback once an internal count reaches 0, and then I can forget to decrement it and so it will never reach 0. But technically this didn't involve synchronization so there isn't a stack trace to tell me why is my program stuck and somehow this is better.
So what does it means that Pony is deadlock free if it can implement deadlocking programs?
A better, more rigorous claim would be that the pony runtime is deadlock free or that there are no primitive blocking operations.
I'd be hesitant to call this a "Pony runtime" property - to my understanding language runtimes just provide application bootstrapping and execution time standard library access. Pony code becomes machine code, managed by the OS as a process with some threads. This language property guarantees you that those threads will never "actually", "truly" deadlock. Code implemented on the Pony level can still progress if it chooses to do so, and Pony formally ensures it always has the option to choose so.
If your business requirements necessitate otherwise, that's a different matter, something you introduce and manage on your own.
I'm not sure if there are any languages that allow you to pass down / inherit language constraints specifically, maybe Lisp or similar can do that? But then often that unfortunately wouldn't be actually helpful, as these requirements usually come from the outside (like in your Python example, it comes from Python being specified such that you can encode deadlocking logic in your Python code).
For most everyone who aren't trying to implement the possibility of deadlocks in guestcode, this remains a useful property even without that.
A simple example is if you get into a situation where two actors are both waiting for the other to send it a message.