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I am not wired to get intrinsic motivation from anything. period.

Might be low T btw

Nope, pretty high on T but without any of the pros of having high T

Anhedonia or negative symptoms of schizophrenia, or something else, might be even me/cfs, or obscure allergy.

... You seem to have intrinsic motivation to write longish texts though, unironically.

Haha, I don't know why I love writing about how shit I am, probably because I am hoping for some miracle