Reading the actual article reminds me of the old soviet joke:

Q: Is it true that Ivan Ivanovich Ivanov from Moscow won a car in a lottery?

    A: In principle yes, but:

    1). it wasn't Ivan Ivanovich Ivanov but Aleksander Aleksandrovich Aleksandrov;

    2). he is not from Moscow but from Odessa;

    3). it was not a car but a bicycle;

    4). he didn't win it, but it was stolen from him.