I don't understand these stories: Do people talk to the maintainer before they work on the change? If not, why not? It seems necessary and obvious to get people on board before you invest in something.
Add to that an infinite stream of bug reports and feature requests, and it gets tiring. I don't even have the time to answer all bug reports...
But I still did not contribute, because their understanding of a good UI was not what I had in mind.
They are office people.
(At least at that time, but I don't think that changed)
And I was used to how graphical design software worked. I would have had to fork and that was out of my scope.