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Comment by zik | Hacker News Reader

Cockies are the pranksters of the bird world. They're smart and they think it's hilarious to mess with each other and anyone else. They also tear everything to pieces. So it's no surprise really that if any bird worked out how to operate a drinking fountain it'd be these hilarious little jerks.

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I was visiting a place that takes in rescue animals, in this case they had a lot of birds.

In their typical speech to people about NOT keeping birds as pets they described some of the birds as "highly curious, the maturity of a human 5 year old, with an intense desire to be destructive".

On top of that, they have one tool, and it's a pair of boltcutters you can't take away. And the most clever of them have a good chance to outlive their owners.

30 to 80 years in captivity! Factors: species and level of care.

20 to 40 in the wild.

Good sense of humour though.

There's one at a wildlife sanctuary in Tasmania reported to be 110 or so ("Fred", Bonorong Wildlife Sanctuary). Original owner is long dead, obviously.

My wife always joke about how parrots sound like a fun pet until you consider the phrase "Flying eternal toddlers, that cannot be diapered or potty-trained, with can-opener mouths."

And the means to achieve that destruction. Cockatoos are like flying bolt cutters.

I aspire to one day befriend a local murder of crows. Not to keep as pets or to make dependent on me, but maybe to bribe to clean up trash or steal quarters for me... or to defend my honor should the need arise.

> hilarious little jerks.

We had a galah chewing our hosepipe the other day. I pointed and said "oi!" and the little scamp stopped, straightened up, looked me right in the eye and ... did it again.

Oh and not to forget the kookas. I heard a pop and noise like water a few weeks ago, and ran into our living room. Outside the main window there's that hose reel mounted on the wall that was spraying freely against the glass. A kookaburra had somehow pulled the hozelock end off and was taking a shower.

The kookaburras here have a reputation for taking snags right off a burning BBQ without apparently hurting themselves.

I will never forget watching a kookaburra swoop down as my grandmother went to take a bite out of a bacon sandwich, and stealing a piece of bacon out of it without touching her or the bread. It then sat on a branch whacking the bacon against it to "kill it" before eating it.

Same with me, but I was camping as a kid. One took the snag out of my mates bread just as he was about to bite it. It made sure it was dead by hitting it on the tree it landed in.

I’m only just across the ditch and needed to search this.

Snag = sausage.

They stole my bacon the same way, serves me right for not sharing I guess

It seems a standard childhood memory! I had a chicken and salad sandwich downgraded to a salad sandwich while I held it my hands as a child. Couple of decades later, almost identical thing happened to my own kid.

If they are the pranksters, I wonder what that makes the Kea. I think they are counted as smarter, they definitely enjoy a bit of malicious fun.

The most accurate representation of "Chaotic Neutral" - the cheeky bastards love stealing ANYTHING, and when there's nothing to steal they'll start ripping the rubber off your car door seals (or windshield wipers).

They are amazing birds, very deserving of the name "Clown of the Mountains".

I'll never understand why we New Zealanders chose a flightless defenseless bird as our national bird when we have so many other great candidates.

I am now obliged to mention bird of the year pūteketeke!

Thank you, John Oliver.

Not so defenseless

Kiwis are very unique and distinctive looking, so it makes sense to an outsider like me. Keas are cool but they kind of just look like parrots.

Keas are gremlins but real.

Weka can be a lot of fun too, I saw a pack of them opening someone's backpack zipper to find out what's inside.

I was hiking and had a Kea flapping its wings on the ground to get our attention while his friend was going through our backpacks.

Ah, team work.

I saw a seagull sneak up to and scream at a guy to make him drop his fish and chips and all his seagull buddies swooped in and took it.

Seagulls, magpie and ibis (im not being fun or joking here) have evolved to exhibit cooperative traits and behaviours to get food, including tricking, diverting, cooperating and most annoying literally staunching people.

I was having a burrito on manly wharf a long while back, a seagull just lands on the table and death stares me...i felt uncomfortable and moved, because i know they will try and take my food off me!

I haven't ever seen Brisbane's beloved bin chickens (ibis) cooperating, but they're pretty good at getting into any bin to scavenge food.

Cockatoos are worse and will flip the lid of a wheelie bin if in the mood. Crows will as well if you overfill and the lid is not shut properly.

I saw an ibis and magpie work on opening a macdonalds bin, take out the black rubbish bag, tear it, splay its contents and fish for paper macdonalds bags!

I looked up the bird..

They are smart!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7W7hEUGtv4U

I liked the Kea messing with traffic cones and redirecting traffic, apparently slowing cars and getting fed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZ4Y7svFgnQ

Local legend has it Kea work it groups. Team work

One group will entertain the tourists (in mountain huts in the back country) by putting on ammusing displays of acrobatics and hijinks

The other team use razor sharp claws and beaks to open thir packs and get to all the interesting stuff inside

When I lived in Australia we had a wooden full length porch (elevated), and where we lived in the hills outside Melbourne we could easily have 20-30 cockatoos hang out on it in the morning. They were mercifully not loud, but they absolutely destroyed the deck rails, and we had to replace them with heavier duty industrial plastic deck.

Caiques and Blue Hyacinths are definitely more pranksters, Cockatoos are just plain psychos.

Or gangsters. We had a bird feeder, which we occasionally let run dry. A cockatoo got pissed with this, and concocted a scheme. When the feeder was empty he sat on the outside fridge and screeched. Once he got your attention, he made sure he was in full view and started destroying things . He only stopped when you put out more feed.

Amused by this I mentioned it at a neighborhood BBQ, and was greeted by a chorus of "oh yes, that happens at my place too". The guy holding the BBQ held up his BBQ tools and said: "See, brand new, this is the 3rd set". It was a neighborhood wide protection racket run by one bird.

Amazing. Cockatoos really are gangsters.

Indeed. My father spent a lot of time bellowing at cockatoos that’d land in his fruit trees and tear them to pieces. He’d storm about and wave a broom at them until they took off. Classic old man yelling at clouds.

When he was on the other side of the house in the garage, they’d take fruit from the trees and drop them on the sloping driveway so they rolled down into the garage. Come play old fella.

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