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You can always work on video games on the side. I used to be in the video game industry, but I'm not anymore. That's what I do now.

Even before I got into the industry I was making video games on the side. The only time I wasn't making games on the side was when I was in the industry itself, as it seemed like a conflict of interest (and the contracts I signed reinforced that).

In order to be able to work on anything at all on the side, how do you propose solving the "it leaves me feeling drained at the end of the day" problem?

I feel you. For me when I found myself in a very similar situation I found 2 answers:

1. Full autonomy and creative freedom (ie my own thing whith no stakeholders to convince, no egghead managers to leak asses, no humiliating performance reviews etc)

2. Highly technically challenging product in a relatively small team (think building postges db vs cobbling up apis and plow through layers of legacy shit to serve another marketing agency nobody will remember in 10 years).

The 2nd is a weaker answer (doesn’t last long either, because companies like cars tend to degrade over time).

The main theme for me is having a deep connection to meaning. Having this magic “why” answered with both my mind and my soul.

Try physical labor: plumbing, electrical, construction. You might like it, and if not you’ll appreciate how easy you had it as a swe.

That sounds quite patronizing.

It’s like telling someone with depression to go to war and then be shamed that he had depression. Like it’s a privilege.

If it was easy for OP we wouldn’t seen this post. Intellectual burn out and stress is much more severe than a stress from manual labor

Nobody cares if the maid is depressed or tired.

Intellectual burnout won't fracture your spine.

That's not to say that depression and burnout don't matter.

But complaining about them is a privilege.

Pretty arrogant and shallow perspective to have. People sometimes kill and harm themselves out of depression and mental issues.

How many people killed themselves because of the broken leg?

Also how often severe traumas happen to residentual plumbers? Vs every second software engineer I know had multiple episodes of burnout or depression or other types pf breakdowns sometimes severely affecting their personal and professional life.

He never said he was depressed.

This is a bit of an overreaction. The OP didn’t mention they were depressed, just unfulfilled.

Manual labour can be quite fulfilling compared to white collar work, as progress is much clearer and it can be a nice mental break compared to an office job.

Of course it’s not for everyone, but at the very least it makes you appreciate the privilege of working in an office

My point is that it's not a privilege at all.

Office work can be just as good/bad/meaningful/useless/hard/easy etc. as manual or almost any type of work these days.

It's very ignorant (and outdated by 50 years in a first world country) to look down on software engineers like they are spoiled children whining about their little naive problems.

(I'm exaggerating to illustrate the point).

I have done both physical labor and software engineering, so I’m speaking from personal experience. If your experience differs, what can I say - everyone is different.

I have done too. And obviously individual cases can vary dramatically. I was trying to average my observations not only from my experience, but all the people I observed throughout my life and my career. I am yet to meet a burnt out electrician.

What’s been your experience working as a plumber, electrician or in construction?

Have you considered transitioning into an IT or even security related role? There can be a lot more of a business side to those roles, which I've seen people enjoy more when they've found that software engineering isn't right for them. The work you do is also placed much further away from the nitty gritty details of software systems and observes things from a bigger picture perspective.

Not OP, but am curious what kind of security roles you have in mind? From what I know, you have to be passionate about it, as there's tons to learn in order to pass the interview stage.

Hey man, I could have written this exact same thing these days. Feel the same. Sending you my energy, you're not alone.

When I think back times where I was most satisfied with life, is when I was working hard on the side on creative stuff - games.

Also tell your employer if you can go 60% or 80%, and if he refuses start looking for roles that will allow that (hard)

There are billions of people in the world that don’t enjoy their jobs and who haven’t kicked their addictions to food and shelter.

The game industry is the most grueling industry to work for. I have a “passion” for a lot of things. I go to work because I don’t like starving - not because I love it.

I would like to do more creative things like make video games or something but I also need to pay rent and I’m worried that if I make something I enjoy doing my career again I will end up in the same spot of not enjoying it anymore

Like approximately everyone else, you have to have a day job.

The nature of day jobs is that even when your day job is doing something you love, you still resent it to some degree because it is a day job...the touring musician still has to ride in rented vans and stay in cheap hotels.

Which is to say that all a day job needs to do is pay for rent and ramen and a good day job allows you to do the things that feed your soul in your time away from it. That's it. Good luck.

Ask HN: Career Change Confusion