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Common ways to sync Obsidian are through cloud tools (Google Drive, OneDrive, etc.), SyncThing Fork or Git.

I'd recommend you to look into SyncThing Fork or a similar tool if you never want your notes to leave your own server.

I wrote about ways to sync Obsidian here: https://bryanhogan.com/blog/how-to-sync-obsidian

If you need multiplayer sync, I've been working on a plugin that makes Obsidian real-time multiplayer (like google docs) called Relay [0]. A lot of our users use it in combination with SyncThing to keep it entirely free for up to 3 users (we also offer a paid plan with attachment storage and more seats).

[0] https://relay.md

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