The service in most American restaurants isn't good; it is obsequious. It is disturbing how many Americans don't notice this.
You might've hit what bugs me about dining out (in the US).
My favorite place for first dates was this particular cafe-restaurant, where a server would come to your table for your order, eventually, but otherwise didn't bother you.
For example, they did none of the apparently standard barge-in of your conversation, 10 minutes after you're served, asking how everything is.
Also, in restaurants in general, some servers have mastered the art of refilling water glasses like a ghost, and somehow asking if you want to refresh your drinks without interrupting your conversation.
But others either aren't able to do that, or come from a school of thought that the top priority is that guests be conscious of the server's willingness to serve.
I tip 20%+ in any case, but I wish more servers would be more subtle.
Why would they change their behavior if you tip anyway?
I'd guess what's needed is to promote a different school of thought via broadcast (e.g., through lifestyle articles and restaurant trade publications).
Though it might be that I'm not representative, and more US diners want to go through the rituals of being served conspicuously, as part of the experience.
Restaurant owners need to balance between overstaffing (and thus spending too much) and understaffing (and having service suffer). The optimal point is different if your opportunity cost is $2 vs $15 per hour.
Thus, in a US restaurant, on average, you’ll see more waiters than in most EU places, given the same amount of tables.
German service (not just in restaurants) is proverbially bad, even among Germans. See https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Servicew%C3%BCste
Berlin Mitte: Agree, yes, atrocious service, many arrogant people, no credit cards because of tax fraud (Lived the startup life in Berlin for 20 years, "Monsieur Vuong" was IMHO the worst for service and arrogance - but then there is "Il Pane e le Rose", lovely people, went there for 20 years, or "Restorani Tbilisi", my favorite restaurant in Berlin, most excellent food and service).
Nice city somewhere else: No. Here in Stralsund we go to 5 restaurants regularly. All are nice, have excellent service, people are friendly, prices are fair (But I so miss Georgian food).
Whereas in the US, it’s all about the tips. And once you’re done with your meal, you’re just delaying the next tip.