You know what's so interesting? If I had known he was going to threaten tariffs, I might have considered shorting a lot of stocks. And well, if I knew he was going to then quickly walk them back the next day, I probably would have bought those same stocks. If only I had known he was going to do this!

Now that I think about it, if he had told me about these things in advance, I could probably make a LOT of money. I mean sure, it's illegal, but we could always gut the SEC[1]!

[1] https://news.bloomberglaw.com/esg/doge-targets-sec-next-for-...