As for being banned from the community, I keep seeing this claim but have never seen or heard of such things happening. Sure, there may be a negative reception to folks who keep wanting to re-litigate a decision that was made over and over, but nobody has been banned from anything.
2. Elm's stance on sync vs async ffi isn't a big deal. A fork is like when there was that IcedCoffeeScript spin off on CoffeeScript: https://maxtaco.github.io/coffee-script/ -- it's more of a gimmick in what is already a tiny ecosystem.
3. Last I checked there was "elm-janitor" for managing patches and getting them into core Elm as an end user or something. Dunno what came of it, but I think it goes back to only a handful of people are going to use something like that. And there are already Elm-inspired languages with ~0 users out there. The hard part is ecosystem.
It's not like Javascript where you can launch something like preact (react but smaller) and get 38k github stars. It's not going to be rewarding.