Yes it’s tragic but that’s the world you’re asking for, people not to have to think because it’s hard. You’re validating that with some ridiculous scenario. Let’s simplify it: is the consumable touching plastic? It’s got plastic in or on it. Is it processed food? It’s got plastic in or on it.
If you want to take the approach where you buy a bunch of stuff and then sit down for hours auditing everything you spent money on, then that’s on you. Consider that if the issue is so extensive you can do the analysis piecemeal if paranoia of it all causes you to be exhausted.
Or don’t wait for reports like this and a politicized regulatory agency in the age of hysteria to make the decisions for you.