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> There have been times I don’t go the funeral. Because the dead person was a horrible person.

The funeral is a ritual for the people who knew and loved the dead person. The question should really be about them, rather than the deceased who is dead and gone.

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And if those people are going to be talking about how great someone I despised was, it's best for all of us if I stay home.

Slightly disagree, only in that the people who supported the horrible person should hear the terrible acts done. Otherwise, yes. No comfort to those who comfort/enable abusers.

I hear this argument again and again, that the dead was despised thus the funeral should not be attended. Really folks, if all people you know are to be despised, then maybe the problem is not with them? Sure, there always is the occasional asshole, but it's not always the one in the coffin, so indeed then there might be times when we should just stay home for the better of everybody.

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