I get that the author really dislikes UHC, but most of these are just really not interesting. For example, of course they want media inquiries to go to the media relations team. That's why they exist! As for referring to a recently deceased CEO as an "esteemed colleague" -- I guess esteem is in the eye of the beholder, but that's such an anodyne way of referring to anyone that I'm having trouble seeing anything noteworthy in it.
I feel for the workers that need to take these calls.
“Talking Points for Calls Related to Event” is, for some reason, amusing to me.