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I think the short answer is: divide and conquer.

It's not everyone. Most are just staying silent and trying to avoid being caught the crossfire.

IMHO it has a lot to do with in-group dynamics and power. The militancy is feeling part of a group, which becomes part of a person's identity, and resisting attacks on that group-based identity.

The Last thing most people want to do is to admit that they are wrong, and the more you tell them they are wrong, the more entrenched in their belief they will be.

50% of the people don't vote.

Extremism sells and divides.

Maybe it's because for the first time in history the GOP is not a political party at all anymore but an evil CULT that even decent minded Republican Voters need to prevent from winning this time around?

Because you're looking at it through the lense of the Internet and high profile events that happen on video. Stop by main street in small town America and things are usually pretty chill. You have the occasional feathers getting ruffled, but nothing like you see online.

Because we take it personally.

We see political decisions as commenting on our very souls. It's not at all about competent administration. It's about being told that our fundamental world-view is right or wrong.

A lot of people find that fun. They find personal affirmation in being told that their world-view is right. They can get that every night from the TV and the Internet. And then every so often we have elections, which will be either life-affirming or soul-destroying.

The fact that we take it so personally clouds our judgment. Both sides accuse the other of putting their personal identity ahead of all other concerns, including basic decency and even truth. Those accusations are so strong that at least one side must be correct. Which makes it self-sustaining.

It doesn't help that there are a lot of influential people who benefit from the conflict.