It's disheartening to think that the virtues you are told to have as a kid are considered "weak sauce" once you are an adult.
Hence why institutional pedagogy is so often rote and has nothing to do with understanding - when we know science of learning says that every human craves understanding (montessori, piaget etc…)
In fact, the shortest way to break the majority of people’s brains is to ask them one of the following questions:
- Can you Explain the reasoning behind your behavior?
- How would you test your hypothesis?
- What led you to the conclusion you just stated?
- Can you clarify the assumptions embedded in your claim?
-Have you evaluated the alternatives to your position?
Good orgs would ask at all 5 in every power gradient direction: so peers, managers, ICs, execs ... although not for everything as you would grind to a halt!
a) maintain the status quo that they, the adult, are all-knowing and generally right, and
b) serves their own purposes (e.g. we can't go to the toy shop, they ran out of toys) rather than deal with the tantrum from just saying "no".
My parents and grandparents would say I should be charitable, helpful, and share, but what actually made them happy? Beating other kids.