This must be a satire piece.

It talks on things like power, reproducibility, etc. Which is fine. There are minority of papers with mathematical errors. What it fails to examine is what is "false". Their results may be valid for what they studied. Future studies may have new and different findings. You may have studies that seem to conflict with each other due to differences in definitions (eg what constitutes a "child", 12yo or 24yo?) or the nuance in perspective apllied to the policies they are investigating (eg aggregate vs adjusted gender wage gap).

It's about how you use them - "Research suggests..." or "We recommend further studies of larger size", etc. It's a tautology that if you misapply them they will be false a majority of the time.