My understanding is that AES has some design warts that make it not ideal (basically, it's easy to both implement and use in ways that leak information if you're not careful) but that it's still essentially perfect symmetric encryption if you're using it as recommended. Is that wrong?
FWIW, the reason I brought up performance was because the OP spends a large chunk of the post talking about it, so I assume it's an important requirement for them.
[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Datagram_Transport_Layer_Secur...
Now I admit ChaPoly has some pretty nice advantages if you're implementing it in software. But with the trend of AES-GCM hardware support and the long-lived nature of WireGuard's crypto choices given the lack of ciphersuite negotiation (which I agree was a good decision!), I'm not sure AES-GCM wouldn't have been the best (albeit less cool) choice.
Although maybe on the other hand, ChaPoly can still be made to run pretty fast even just in software and it gives WireGuard the advantage of being more practical on very low-end devices that might lack AES-GCM hardware. Avoiding ciphersuite negotiation means a tradeoff needs to be made somewhere, at least with current algorithms, and I'd bet line-rate hardware encryption is probably the least likely place to see WireGuard for a while at least, so maybe WireGuard did make the best tradeoff at the time.
I agree in advance, Noise already uses counter-based nonces, the extended nonce wouldn't matter to vanilla Noise.
I wanted to push back a little on the notion that Chapoly was "cool" and GCM was "lame" back in 2015-2016. At the time, GCM was coming off a pretty rough run of implementation bugs. It was the tail end of a period of time where a concern was that some mainstream architectures wouldn't be able to run performant constant-time GCM at all; like, the fast software GCMs had a table-driven multiplication? I forget the details.
But you could have done a secure WireGuard instantiated on AES-GCM. It's true that GCM was out of fashion and Chapoly was in fashion. I just want to say, that fashion had (has?) some real technical roots. That's all.