Comment by titusjohnson | Hacker News Reader

Comment by titusjohnson | Hacker News Reader

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As a homeschooled kid, the thing about your story that really sticks out to me is that you even felt you had the agency to make any of these decisions.

You just ... decided to enroll? You, as a child, can do that? I didn't obtain that kind of personal agency until my early 20's. My late teens were a confusing time of basically waiting for any kind of adult to tell me what I was allowed to do.

You didn't like it and ... just went back to a different school? That's something that you can do?

You just... dropped out? You had that option?

My experience is the polar opposite. My mom kept a vice grip on everything we learned. Bringing up wanting to go to Public School resulted in literal months of venom and self-victimization (aka: "I guess you hate how I sacrificed my body to bring you into this world ,and I sacrificed my dreams to stay here and raise good Christian children"), various punishments, and bible verse memorization assignments. Books were excised from the house if there was a hint of independence within. My mom literally took away a book I was reading about an orphan boy and his love of dirt-bike racing because on one page, the boy's foster parents asked him if he would attend church with them, he politely declined, and the foster parents accepted that. My Mom told me she "didn't want me thinking that was OK" when she took it away.

To me, being accepting of home-schooling is in the same camp as ditching all CI tooling because "every developer's style is valid and has its benefits". Accepting home-schooling means accepting that the lowest common denominator is good enough to teach the next generation.

I get what you're saying. In my case, I had full control because my parents were aloof. I easily got them to go along with whatever I wanted and sign any necessary forms because they didn't care. I'm not sure how I would feel with the opposite problem of helicopter parents. I think I would have benefited from some parental involvement and support, but as I am now an adult, the thought of worrying about a child and their school after working all day is exhausting to me and I can see how my parents made the choice they did. A lot of people put huge efforts into their kids schools and end up with poor outcomes.

It sounds like your experience was pretty terrible and I’m sorry that you’d spent formative and enjoyable years suffering.

We homeschool our kids and are generally quite the opposite (we’ve never been religious either). I wouldn’t say we are smarter than tertiary teachers in specific fields, but for the junior years it doesn’t really matter. Our kids are (electively) performing at higher grades than their age level requires, and we support that where they’re interested in it.

We do structured learning every day and also unstructured learning and just enjoying life. It’s a good balance that enables us to raise the happiest kids we can. My eldest has expressed an interest in going to school next year, we are fostering that interest and if he’s still keen next year we will enable that too.

People make blanket statements about homeschool, public school and private school. But after having kids one thing is certain: everyone’s experience is incredibly unique.

> Accepting home-schooling means accepting that the lowest common denominator is good enough to teach the next generation.

This is just as true for most public schools. GP is rather unique in that most students don't get to choose where they learn. The option(s) available to them are often constrained by their zip code. Of those that had a meaningful choice, most tested into a magnet/exam/grammar school, lived in a charter school friendly areas, or resided in a city with a bussing program. In spite of what you've suffered, home schooling shouldn't be condemned wholesale. I've met several home-schooled individuals with interesting lives and well-rounded educations rivaling those of private school graduates.

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