Philosophy basically forked after Kant pointed out that the human brain does a sort of computation on sensory data.

Kant basically handed it off to the scientists, mathematicians and computer scientists except for a lot of fiddly bits around justifications and foundations. This is essentially the analytic school.

The other school jumped the shark and aligned with the Romantics and produced Hegel and Fichte and their descendants. This group tends to be opposed to the idea that truth exits and politically has a reactionary longing toward an imagined primitive past. And that longing combined with the belief in the inevitability of history and the valuelessness of human life has led to immense amounts of destruction. For the most part there just isn't anything to cite there that counts as philosophy in the sense it was understood since ancient times.

I don't see why "European" philosophy (I assume you mean continental) is any more global than analytic philosophy. Both originate from what is only a small sliver of humanity. In fact continental philosophy with its heavy French and German focus, comes from an even smaller demographic base than Anglo world, which at the very least includes the US, Canada, the UK, Australia, and New Zealand.

Continental Philosophy is basically useless. Critical Theory is usually fashionable nonsense, and the best continentals are the most fashionable and the most nonsensical.

You know it's bad when one of the champions of the Continentals, Zizek, is at his most coherent in a decade when he's talking about how he received the "N word pass" - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkvw6BUgU0I

Contemporary philosophy is Anglo-centric. Why is it strange?