At HBO Max every incident had a full writeup and then real solutions were put in place to make the service more stable.
My team had around 3 incidents in 2 years.
If the cultural expectation is that the on call buzzer will never go off, and that it going off is a Bad Thing, then on call itself isn't a problem.
Or as I was fond of saying "my number one design criteria (for software) is that everyone gets to sleep through the night."
The customers win (stable service) and the engineers win (sleep).